To the idiot who decided to walk onto my driveway last night:
I hope that you impressed your friends with your ability to kick off my driver-side mirror. I hope that everyone got a good laugh, and perhaps high-fived you for your accomplishment.
For your sake though, I hope that you had been drinking and that you’re not plagued with being so dumb every moment of your life. Perhaps this is what people refer to as “street smarts”.
Me, on the other hand, I’m not so great. I did not enjoy waking up to find my mirror in the snow. I did not enjoy driving to the dealership and finding out that it’s going to cost $300 to replace. This is not news one wants to hear a week before Christmas.